Home > Uncategorized > Gettin’ into the holiday spirit

Gettin’ into the holiday spirit

Don't even thinking about shaking that present

I’m a complete sucker for Christmas time, and that makes early December one of my favorite times of the year. Thanksgiving’s past, so I can focus completely on the 25th, and all the Christmas songs and decorating and hooplah haven’t dragged on so long that I’m ready to stuff my head in a stocking and wait for the whole thing to be over. Plus, nothing reminds me so strongly of my childhood as decorating the Christmas tree: I put on Leroy Anderson’s “Sleigh Ride,” I unwrap my old tree ornaments, and suddenly I’m 7-years old again, hanging my little soldier-mouse again right front and center of the tree (to guard the presents below, of course). Did I ever tell you that I can still recite, from memory, the entire “Garfield’s Christmas TV Special?” Ah, nostalgia.

And cry blasphemy, but I love the commercialism, cheap sentimentalism, and kitschiness of it all, if for not other reason than I can both enjoy the holiday season and feel ironically superior to everyone else about it: joy to the world! So in honor of Christmas cheer and Christmas greed, my wish list.

For Christmas, I want:

–A Kindle (this one’s for real. Kindle Touch–Amazon, I’m selling you my soul, don’t let me down).

–A smooth drive to Minnesota to see family.

–Blissful ignorance of how cold Minnesota is going to be.

–An NBA season (check and double-check! It’s go time!)

–Blazers winning the NBA championship (well, at least a non-Lakers, non-Celtics, non-Heat championship. I’m a hater’s hater)

–A Sunday Christmas program not arranged by Janice Kapp Perry. How about a Sunday Christmas program with traditional, classic Christmas songs? Does anybody really think they can out-do “O Come all Ye Faithful?” Why do we botch this every year?

–For South Bend theaters to get some better movies. No, I do not want to see Puss in Boots. I will not watch it happily, I will not watch it in 3-D. Not in a mall. Not in a hall. I will not watch it, no, not at all.

–Peace on Earth, goodwill towards men. (If you’re sappy with at least one thing on your list, Santa brings you everything else)

"And then Dad plugs in the lights, and everyone goes 'Ooooooh,' and Garfield says, 'Nice touch.' And then..wait, you don't want me to finish?"

Categories: Uncategorized
  1. December 6, 2011 at 10:06 pm

    Such a great post, and not just because of the Garfield’s Christmas reference (though any post with a GC reference is a good one!). I agree 100% … or almost 100%, since I’m not nearly the NBA fan you are — but I would like to enjoy that weather you speak of. Let’s hope.

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